Chasing sugar high children

"Excuse me sir, we have football practice on the other side of the gym, so you will have to control your kids"

Perfect, just what I needed to hear. I thought having my class moved to the gym would allow me to play games, and maybe, just maybe, tire the kids out so they will sit still long enough for me to explain the next activity.

Instead I am forced to run around collecting wayward children who are more interested in kicking soccer balls than they are about learning english words, such as "pencil" and "bus".

It's not that they are difficult to catch, but there are 10 of them and only one of me. Usually I can wrestle 3 of them back to their seats, but if 4 run away, it's a whole new game.

I'm not sure how I got myself into this situation in the first place, but apparently it's because I have a nice smile.

I've only been in Hong Kong for one week, and within an hour of applying for jobs I've scheduled two interviews. Things are looking good! I figured teaching English couldn't be too difficult, I speak it all the time.

Though I said only 5 words during the initial 30 minutes of the interview, my future boss announced "You have a nice big smile! So I think this will work out" Feeling uncomfortable, but pleased to have secured work so quickly, I agreed to start 3 days later, no training, just me and ten five year olds, for 3 hours each day.

Now, cursing under my breath, I am attempting to herd the children back to their seats, so that the soccer coach, who is having a much easier time engaging his kids, won't lose his cool.

It doesn't help that the kids' snacks were laced with enough sugar to turn the whole group into a flock of hummingbirds.

After seeing the packages of oreo cookies, and kit-kat chocolate bars, being flung enthusiastically from their back-packs, following my announcement of "Snack time!", I began to loosen up my muscles, by doing some light stretching, to get ready for the inevitable chase.

While my dietitian brain cringed when I saw what the kids were eating, what I really wondered was whether or not the children's parents were intentionally trying to punish the teacher.

"Okay, everybody listen to teacher Joshua!" I yell to the group, finally having them back within the vicinity of the table. "New rule, you may only eat while you are seated at the table, if you do not listen, I will take your snacks away until the end of class".

I've heard on numerous occasions that you shouldn't use food to bribe children, or as a reward; and while my new rule could hardly fit those two categories, I now understand why this is such a popular strategy.

The fear of having their snacks confiscated, snaps the children to attention, and they shuffle grudgingly to their seats.

I'm satisfied, but painfully aware of how short this will last. So I stand, observing their behaviour, and plot my next move.